Categories
Essay

The Witch’s Familiar: The Only Other Chair on Skaro

"So why am I tied up?"
“So why am I tied up?”

The action starts right after last week’s cliffhanger “The Magician’s Apprentice“, where it looked like Clara and Missy were killed by Daleks. As it turns out, Missy faked their deaths with a Vortex Manipulator/Sonic Screwdriver hack. Introduced in this episode, it comes off as the deus ex machina plot bailout from the Russell T. Davies era. Steven Moffat pulled similar solutions from nowhere in “The Big Bang,” and “The Impossible Astronaut“.

The suspension bondage scene, however, hinted at Clara’s adrenaline addiction. Briefly hinted at last season, it gets a bit more definition in “Under the Lake.” Clara thinks nothing of waking up in classic Wonder Woman predicaments.

Get Out!

The red and gold Dalek is like Iron Man insecurity: a wounded, frightened nerd hiding in super powered armor. Dalek armor was orginally designed as protection from radiation, which came from their civil war with the Thals. This distinction is lost on most Doctor Who writers, who portray Daleks as generic sci-fi killer robots.

It was nice seeing humans stoop under doorways ergonomically designed for Daleks.

Seeing the Doctor in Davros’ chair was terrific, but Moffat cheated us of seeing how he did it. Did the Doctor forcibly yank him out, like Mr. Pink’s carjacking scene in Reservoir Dogs? If so, Twelve is the most two-fisted, film noir Doctor ever.

Daleks Have Sewers?

mightPunch

How does Clara fall 20 feet with no broken bones? How does Clara get out of that goopy Dalek suit without one stain? If you even think “just accept it,” I will jump through this computer or mobile device and punch you in the nose.

Missy’s in complete control, but even she initially freaked out when she found out she was on Skaro. Her scenes aren’t written well enough to tell if her sense of security comes from superior knowledge or delusional insanity. There simply aren’t enough calm moments in Michelle Gomez’s performance to judge. Like John Simm, she plays the homicidal Time Lord like Jack Nicholson’s Joker: a hammy, bloodthirsty cartoon. These funny-but-senseless scenes could be in an Avengers movie.

By the way, I’m not slamming the actors. Their performances are guided, controlled, and defined by the showrunners.

The Dalek graveyard is another deus ex machina plot device. Without it, Missy and Clara would have been killed by the living sewers of Skaro. I’m beginning to think this episode was ghost-written by Rose “Bad Wolf” Tyler.

I can’t stand the Doctor’s begging for Clara’s life, especially in context of Dalek’s killing and prison camps. It is, however, consistent with Doctor Who history. Jo Grant, Sarah Jane, both Romanas, Nyssa, Tegan, Peri Brown…even Mel got desperate pleas! Perhaps emotional connections to Earthlings shield him, and us, from typical Time Lord traits of detachment and violence.

For a witch’s familiar, Clara’s really frightened. She came off as a dominatrix last season. How is this “I’m going to die” moment any different than the others she’s faced since “The Bells of Saint John?”

Tonight, We Entrap a Time Lord

“You keep saying that; you keep not dying” reminds me of Hyman Roth in Godfather II.

When did Davros become such a smooth talker? It had to happen sometime after “Journey’s End.” Moffat seems to be confusing him for the Roger Delgado era Master. If Davros’ original plan was “tearing the Doctor apart to take his regeneration energy,” why did he waste all night stroking the Doctor’s compassion? Davros can only see compassion as a cancer.

The “we’re both the same” moral ambiguity reminds me of older, better examples. The theme was executed with more nuance by Alan Moore (Batman: The Killing Joke ,) John Woo (The Killer, Bullet in the Head, Hard Boiled), Hayao Miyazaki (People of the Desert,) and just about any Toshiro Mifune/Akira Kurosawa film film.

The Doctor’s counter-plot isn’t any more convincing. He’d have died if Missy didn’t free him, oozing his new regeneration cycle on Skaro. Perhaps Moffat earned his cliffhanger serial writing degree from Republic Pictures.

I’m Helping a Little Boy I Abandoned on a Battlefield

Aside from seeking personal redemption by saving the cute white kid, how is maiming a bunch of Handmines humane? This is a 180-degree turn from understanding others. This also points to the Doctor’s hypocritical stance on revising one’s personal history. This is the same guy that lectured Rose Tyler about fixed points in time in “Father’s Day?” The Monk from “Time Meddler” looks better every day.

Stray Thoughts

Obviously, I ran out of time last week. Shut up.

  • Only on Doctor Who could sludge be a deadly weapon.
  • The callback to “Asylum of the Daleks” is pretty good.
  • On the Dalek’s concept of mercy, does Moffat even remember his own scripts?
  • “Your sewers are revolting” is a great line.
  • For reasons I can’t reveal yet, the TARDIS Hostile Action Displacement System is brilliant.
  • “The Doctor and Clara Oswald in the TARDIS” is just awful.
  • Does everyone on new Who speak fluent punch-line?
Categories
Essay

The Witch’s Familiar: Am I a Good Man?

Lies, manipulation, and trickery — “The Witch’s Familiar” burns these candles on the altar of Skaro. The question is who will be sacrificed? Put your hip boots on because the excrement is rising and you’re going to have to wade through the B.S. to decide who has placed the spells and on whom.

Hex’s aside, where did Missy get the rope that has Clara hung upside down from a rock and looking a lot like The Hanged Man of the Tarot? (As an aside, it was kind of Missy to use the rope to keep Clara’s skirt from falling to reveal her nether regions.) In the finale of a two-parter that began with “The Magician’s Apprentice,” perhaps the answer is that Missy/Master has the conjuring powers of magic? And while she was at it, she conjured up a relatively substantial stick (on a planet with minimal vegetation and petrified jungles) and a whittling knife, implying that she may get hungry enough to eat her dangling prey. There is no doubt that Michelle Gomez uses her lines to maximum effect and certainly has the ability to bewitch all through her hilarious and paradoxical antics. The Hanged Man is the card of suspension and the unlikely trio (Doctor, Master, and Companion) have definitely found themselves suspended in uncertainty on Skaro.

After last week’s episode we were left wondering if Missy and Clara survived extermination. Ok, not really, we knew they survived, but how? Missy enlightens us with narrative, while the producers/directors provide us with a visual of the Doctor’s escape from Androids. Then with a few eye-wink taunts toward Clara and a decision that the two of them have a mission to save the Doctor, they are off to the heart of the Dalek empire. Though not without one final quip from Missy: “Pity then, I was actually quite peckish.” I was literally delighted at the tonality Missy used in saying peckish!

Inside the Dalek empire, Davros begins to have what appears to be a heart-to-two-heart talk while the Doctor perseverates on how to find out if Clara has survived. He succeeds in removing Davros from his chair and leaves his half-body writhing on the floor. Free-wheeling out of the infirmary (dare I say arrogantly) in Davros’ chair, the Doctor confronts the Daleks.

The Daleks use multiple guns to exterminate him and we are provided a mini-cliff hanger while we switch to Clara and Missy contemplating the depth of the drop to the sewer system, which is the graveyard for decaying Daleks. Chalk another one up for Missy’s evil sarcasm as she bumps Clara from the edge. “Twenty feet,” Missy surmises when Clara hits bottom. I don’t know about you, but if I fell twenty feet, it is likely that I wouldn’t pop up without an ankle twist or a hurt arm, but Clara miraculously jumps to her feet, angry. Maybe the adrenalin means she’s overlooked her pain.

Briefly back to the Doctor who has thwarted the extermination and is casually drinking tea. In case anyone questions the Doctor’s abilities, he helps us out with the answer. Because…”I’m the Doctor. Just accept it.” Is this Moffat’s way of covering for inconsistency and plot holes? Back at the infirmary Davros has other plans and Colony Sarff is more than willing to assist.

By this point we’re approximately one-third through the episode and I’m wondering at Missy’s motives with regard to Clara. She pulls Clara emotionally back and forth, implying demise then referring to them as a team. Missy, as we know, does nothing without forethought. And her forethought is always a ticking bomb. The bomb of a line that she drops on us in the sewer is an allusion to her past liaison with the Doctor on Gallifrey. She takes a brooch off to direct dark star magic and intimates: “…the Doctor gave it to me when our daughter…” She is startled and we are left with that. Huh? She kills an arriving Dalek using her stick and a really bad Texan accent then encases Clara in the Dalek’s shell. We’re reminded of the classic Who episode, The Daleks, and Ian Chesterton’s climb into an empty Dalek shell (season 1, second story).

Dreams and flashbacks and we find the Doctor waking, seated on the only other chair on Skaro. Davros is talking, setting up the Doctor but certainly offering clues. Perhaps the creators of Doctor Who thought we, the audience, would be easily led by the manipulation, but the savvy viewer saw the snake eyes on the cable and knew Colony Sarff was going to cause the Doctor trouble. From Davros’ perspective the Doctor reveals, again, his greatest weakness and he believes that he can play on the compassion that plagues the Doctor’s personality.

Meanwhile, Clara is indoctrinated to the mental capacity that will move her Dalek casing. Now that she is firmly seated inside the shell and it is closed, the scene is reminiscent of Oswin Oswald (“Asylum of the Daleks,” series 7, first episode). Oswin was wholly converted to Dalek. Perhaps it was the full conversion that made the difference, but I was still left questioning how Oswin could speak and it would be translated verbatim, but when Clara spoke the words were bastardized by the Dalek casing. When I consider that further, it must be observed that the Dalek wiring was supposed to be picking up Clara’s thoughts and those thoughts would control the casing. How, then, without the actual Dalek physical body inside, could the Dalek casing change Clara’s words? To finish watching the episode that confusion must be put aside or we’d never get through the scene that allows the Doctor to discover Clara in the Dalek without derision.

We are treated to further seemingly endearing, though manipulative conversations between the Doctor and Davros. We laugh when the Doctor chooses to save the sunglasses because we are in on the joke, but Davros is not. For the first time we see Davros open his own eyes to look at the Doctor. And I don’t know about you, but I let out a loud guffaw when Davros asked if he was a good man. It may be at this point that the Doctor fully realizes Davros’ manipulation and plots the demise of Davros, the Daleks, and the heart of the empire. Calling upon regeneration energy, the doctor grabs the cables, which are Colony Sarff, and his regeneration energy surges into Davros and all the Daleks — all the Daleks and that includes the undead. You’ve got your wading boots on, right? Because, you guessed it, the excrement of decaying Daleks is literally rising through the pipes of the city, causing destruction and eventual demise. Of course the Doctor would not have been stupid enough to allow the Daleks to remain half Time Lord and half Dalek, now would he?

It does appear that Missy saves the day when she bursts in to sever the Doctor’s electric connection. Always the paradox, Missy’s “goodness” soon reverts to her typical evil ways when she attempts to get the Doctor to murder Clara. Remember when I said you needed to suspend the question of the Dalek casing mistranslating Clara’s speech? Well, if you have not been able to do that, then the touching ending will be entirely lost. Clara’s emotions eventually cause the Dalek to say the word mercy, which the Doctor surmises has been coded into Dalek genetics. And that word saves Clara from death at the Doctor’s hand. How did the coding of mercy occur?

After the Doctor and Clara escape the city, cue the Doctor’s return to the young Davros. Exterminating hand mines, the Doctor saves the young boy, causing a small piece of mercy to be implanted into Dalek genetics. And the rest is timey-wimey, wibbly-wobbly. “So long as there’s mercy. Always mercy.”

No, this episode isn’t smooth, consistent sailing either. However, it provides some interesting links between characters and some great dialogue with memorable one-liners from Missy, the Doctor, Davros, and Clara, especially as Oswin throw-back.

I’ve yet to read discussion regarding the titles of the two-part opener for Series 9. Who is the magician and who is the apprentice? Who is the witch and who is the familiar? Missy does refer to Clara as a poppet, does this imply that Missy is the witch? Would that make the Doctor the magician? Or are the titles simply used by Moffat because we’re approaching the cusp of October and the magical time of year?

Finally, in this finale, is Missy the sacrifice on Skaro’s altar? Yes, I already know your answer, but the discussion could be fun.

Categories
Essay

The Magician’s Apprentice: From Kahn to Skaro

Series 9 of Doctor Who started off with a bang, delivering the good, the bad and the WTF we’ve come to expect. “The Magician’s Apprentice” is half of a 2-part story. Here’s what I got out of the season’s big premiere.

Have You Ever Seen a Hand Mine?

When done well, the time travel genre can express character transformation. Look what it did for Phil Connors in Groundhog Day. This might be the best example of the Doctor “making his own monster” since The Face of Evil.

Of course Kanzo, the compassionate black soldier, had to die saving the cute white kid. As a product of British culture, Doctor Who has always been tone-deaf to race. Tomb of the Cybermen has the big, dumb, black manservant Toberman. The Talons of Weng-Chiang (fourth Doctor) and Four to Doomsday (fifth Doctor) use the term “china man” as tool of oppression. Even in the Russell T Davies era “The Shakespeare Code ,” the Doctor dismisses Martha’s logical concerns about becoming a slave (which was later picked up in “Human Nature”/”Family of Blood.“)

“Hand mine” is a great pun. I thought the creatures were a copy of that child-eating monster from Pan’s Labyrinth (2006) Turns out that was inspired by Tenome, a mythical creature from the Japanese picture book series Gazu Hyakki Yakō (“The Illustrated Night Parade of A Hundred Demons,” published in 1776.)

Davros Remembers

The Maldovarian bar scene is a sustained cliché. Was that Figrin D’an and the Modal Nodes playing “My Angel Put the Devil in Me” in the background? Like Pepperidge Farm, Davros remembers. But why does he send Colony Sarff all over the universe like an intergalactic thug-a-gram? “Tell me what I want to know, or I’ll do something…cinematic!” He should’ve called the Twelfth Cyber Legion; they seemed to know everything in A Good Man Goes To War” (written by Steven Moffat). Davros could have delivered his cryptic message more efficiently with email, chat, or GoToMeeting.

Then there’s the “super powered servant” cliché. The earliest example I can think of is Silver Surfer (Fantastic Four #48–50, 1966). The Surfer, however, did reconnaissance for a real “destroyer of worlds.” Colony Sarff is more pointless than Luca Brasi.

Why can’t the Doctor have super powered companions?

What are Colony Sarff’s superpowers, anyway? They seem like the Mara from Kinda, who could manipulate the weakened Davros. How’d he get past those scary Judoon to break into the Shadow Proclamation? In typical new Who plot sloppiness, show runners hope the scene is too awesome for us to care how it happened…or that we don’t remember past episodes. It’s like they don’t know their audience.

It Saves Time

The banter between the Doctor and High Priestess Ohila was terrific. Although she wasn’t alive when the fourth Doctor met the Sisterhood in The Brain of Morbius, their personal friendship seems almost that long. She certainly isn’t fazed by his compulsive lying. Her plea shows a sad, helpless frustration of not being able to stop a loved one from self-destruction. Quoting a Rilo Kiley line, the Doctor seemed as “ready to go” as he did at the end of Planet of the Spiders. Moffat being Moffat, he almost ruined this with his sappy “you can never lose a friend” line.

It’s too bad Moffat decided the High Priestess couldn’t be Ohica, played by Gillian Brown in The Brain of Morbius. Hiring Ms. Brown to reprise the role would have been a nice touch.

#ThePlanesHaveStopped

Clara Oswald is still a horrible teacher. How would “Jane Austin’s a phenomenal kisser” not get her fired? A real teacher wouldn’t have time for Danny or the Doctor. In a credibility nose-dive from An Unearthly Child, last season’s portrayal of teaching is less believable than time travel and “little blue men with three heads.”

Without turning the show into Room 222 or The Secret Life of the American Teenager, this could have been fixed by giving each story a brief moment to Clara’s job preparation. She could have graded on the TARDIS, bounced ideas off P.E. over dinner, or confided with her grandmother (which would have made amazing for both generations of independent women).

UNIT is just as clumsy and indiscrete as they were under the Brig. Those morons outed Clara as a government operative. I’m beginning to think the MI6 passed on Kate Stewart’s resume. In an even bigger WTF moment, the woman who was ready to blow up the world in “Day of the Doctor” is insecure plot device, deferring to the worst high school teacher since Henry “Indiana” Jones.

We have Sir Arthur Conan Doyle to thank for the “gifted amateur” being smarter than trained professionals. In his world, police are incompetent, authority figures are mean, and women are mysterious at best.

Sherlock Holmes‘ super power was “Holmesian deduction, solving crimes with forensic science (fingerprints, anthropometry, toxicology and ballistics.) When the first novel was published in 1887, however, Scotland Yard was using forensic science for 60 years (chemistry in 1832, bullet comparison in 1835.) Perhaps this inspired the phrase “No shit, Sherlock.”

Kate should’ve applied the BBC’s 1960s archive policy to Clara’s memory again, and calmly lead the UNIT geeks into finding the Doctor.

I hope they show how Missy survived “Death in Heaven” in next week’s conclusion. “Not dead, back, big surprise, never mind” is just damn lazy. Worse, it took me out of the story. Even a lame, hacked-out super villain escape story is better than none.

On the positive, this might be the best exploration of the Doctor/Master relationship since the unproduced The Final Game. Missy’s definition of friendship vague, evades her love of bloodshed, but hints at just enough to be intriguing. Clara’s “I’m the tin dog” moment was delightful.

You Said You Wanted an Axe Fight

Guilt of creating Davros throws the Doctor into a downward spiral, much like Tony Stark in Iron Man 2. His emotional “party like it’s 1999” breakdown is jarring to watch, almost like a reality show. (Bors could have been played by Gary Busey.) In this context, especially with the “all of me” line, Capaldi’s electric guitar is a logical connection to Troughton’s flute.

Why are there no consequences for bringing 21st century technology and slang to the 12th century? Are the Reapers too busy chasing The Monk?

A Thousand Years of Fighting

The Doctor’s explanation of the Daleks is more compelling and human than past serials. Using footage from Genesis of the Daleks was a stroke of genius. Michelle Gomez’ Missy is a lot like Tom Baker’s Doctor: they both speak in riddles, have to prove their intelligence every moment, and delightfully infuriate the people they’re trying to help. Davros’ “Do you know why you came, Doctor” is reminiscent of the manipulative Oracle’s “…you’ve already made the choice. Now you have to understand it.”

Stray Thoughts

Yes, I ran out of time. Shut up.

  • Why would any modern action hero use the term “archenemy”?
  • Picking up from “Last Christmas,” someone calls the Doctor a magician.
  • The Skaro reveal is cool, complete with the “Stolen Earth” soundtrack.
  • The red/gold Dalek looks like Iron Man.
  • The Doctor panics over Clara…why? Why would he beg Davros to save Clara’s life? This seems like a repeat of “Stolen Earth.”
  • Missy’s sales pitch to the Daleks is consistent with the classic Who Master.
  • Why would the Daleks bring the TARDIS to Skaro to destroy it…why not destroy it on Earth in 1138?
  • Does every show runner get to create a dismissible black boyfriend?